Today Sucks

I'm absolutly sure today is the most hormonal I've ever been in my life. It started out bad from the very beginning. The phone woke me up this morning. My hubby didn't answer it because he was outside having a ciggarette. I struggled and finally managed to get off the futon to answer it. They hung up on me. And thus the start of a wonderful day!

We decided to go to the mall. Hubby and my cousin decided to go to the mall because they wanted to buy something. Did I mention that someone hit our car again the other day and we got some insurance money for it? Yes, I'm starting to think perhaps my "money altar" is in fact an "insurance scam altar." Where was I.. Oh yes. So, we get all ready to go. I shower and then bring the baby in to clean her up. As I'm getting dressed, the baby runs around the kitchen and gets into #1. My cousins deoderant he left out. Yummy! Now my daughter smells like Axe. #2. A cup of old coffee on the table. She dips paper into it, and then licks the paper and drips coffee all over her clean outfit I just put on her. #3 Finds the jar of peanut butter that hubby left out, open. Puts her whole hand and arm in the jar to eat it and stuff her face (and hair) with the nutty goodness. This all put me in a SUPER GREAT mood. She wasn't done yet though! As I'm getting on my shoes, she systematically throws EVERYTHING off the table! Bills. Gone! Pencil. Gone! Plate? Gone! Hand over hand she tosses everything to the floor. I should have just said "Screw it!" and stayed home right there.. but Nooooooo.

At the mall she decides she doesn't want to stay in the stroller. She screams. She kicks. I'm trying to look at a rack of clothes (for HER.. babies! So ungrateful sometimes.) Wonderful loving hubby says, "I'm going to the store across the way." and he pushes the stroller away from him towards where I'm standing. Just how am I supposed to pay for anything when him and his debit card are not there? And for that matter, how am I supposed to even think at all with her screaming at the top of her lungs? I left the store.

Fast forwards to about 20 other stores where the same thing happens. I try many times to just get away from dh and my cousin, but he follows me. Grrrr! I didn't want him behind me. I didn't want him saying, "Are you done yet?" I just wanted to be left alone! If I can't buy anything because I can't concentrate to look at things, the least he can do is let me putter around aimlessly while he focuses his hurried self somewhere else at things that interest HIM! (because obviously the things I'm looking at bore him to tears. If it doesn't go into an Xbox or a cd drive than he doesn't want it.)

My stomach was hungry. I thought maybe some pizza would make us feel better. We walk to the pizza place in the mall and I see the prices. I know I've been eating like a horse lately, so I suggest maybe Pizza Hut instead. I mean, for the price of 4 slices of pizza here.. we could get a whole pizza and a meal there. Ya know?

Well he didn't like that idea. He got grumpy at me. I walked out to sit in front of the store to calm down. Course dd is screaming, "Pizza!" and crying now. What does he do? He follows me out again! He makes a sarcastic comment about how "Mama said you can't have pizza baby cause its too expensive." Grrrrr... I go back in, buy one slice for her and sit down. She screams anyway because what she really wants is to go to sleep. (I already tried the carrier and nummies, but she just wanted to bite them instead.)

We try to salvage what is left of the afternoon. He ends up buying a game, and no matter what I go to buy... no one has it. Doesn't matter what it is! Simply can't find it, or the store doesn't have it. What luck I had today! Went to look for new sandles, and dh runs the stroller into the back of my heel my accident. I broke down into tears in the middle of Payless. I stood there for 5 minutes while people walked around me, just crying.

We finally left. The ride home was better, we were talking and laughing. Traffic was a bit heavy and I was kinda jumpy at his braking. (he doesn't brake til he gets right up on a car) A car moved out of our lane and he sped up a bit, but there was a car stopped in front of the other that we didn't see. He put the breaks on, I screamed. Then I bawled my eyes out for 10 minutes.

I can't tell you how many times I thought in my head today, "I just want to go home.". I don't know whether he was being an asshole more than usual, or if I was being super hormonal. I'm willing to bet it was a bit of both..